


Among The Stars

by stvrked



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Heavy Angst, I don't know what I'm doing, M/M, Nebula & Tony Stark Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 18:22:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16917945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stvrked/pseuds/stvrked
Summary: Based on Avengers: Endgame trailer.Leave kudos & comments!





	Among The Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Based on Avengers: Endgame trailer.  
> Leave kudos & comments!

Tony couldn't remember how long it has been since everyone disintegrate. Since Peter disintegrate. He's not even sure if he wants to know. Luckily, there was food and water, also oxygen supplies. It's twice as much for him, considering his new friend, Nebula, didn't need any of those to live. Tony had been spending his time in the jet, ripping his mask apart, trying to find a way to communicate with anyone on earth. It won't connect, so he decided to record videos after videos. Mostly for Rhodey, some for Pepper, and he left one for May and Peter, in case he'll be dead when everyone else came back. He didn't know, he didn't hope, he was tired of praying and mumbling that everything's gonna be fine, that someone will find a way. He's tired.

Nebula came to inform Tony that there are no more food and water four days ago. His stomach grumbled and his throat was dry, he tried his best to survive. Nebula offered some parts of herself - not for Tony to eat, no - to fix the jet. Tony refused, he knew it'd hurt Nebula despite what she said and he can't afford to put anyone else in pain. The oxygen supply would run out the next morning and he didn't know what to do. The only reason he stayed alive all this time without oxygen was the bleeding edge armor but he had to rip it off piece by piece so he could try to contact someone. He told Nebula that if he dies before anyone rescue them, she should remember that he made some videos for his loved ones and that she should let them know once she's saved. Nebula herself didn't know if she's going to go anywhere else, but she nodded.

Nebula had been a great companion for Tony, he's very thankful for her. She doesn't talk much but she listens. Tony's glad that he's listened, for once. No one listened to Tony, not even Peter, that kid is a trouble. But he's a kid, Tony loves him, he's a great kid. Tony felt so guilty for what happened, he's a kid. He was just a kid. Rhodey listens to Tony when Tony talks, but Tony could barely talk to Rhodey after what happened in Siberia. He still hadn't told him what happened with Steve, he just told Rhodey that he let Steve go with T'Challa. He knew where Steve had been hiding and what he had been doing all this time. Steve. Surprisingly, when it comes to stupid babblings and rantings, Steve listens to him the most. Tony would talk and complain to himself as he works on one of his armors and Steve would sit down on the floor, smiling at every words that leave Tony's mouth while Steve sketched him.

Steve. Tony remembered that he hadn't record anything for Steve. The only reason Tony was hanging on by the thread is so he could tell Steve how sorry he was in person. But he's dying, there goes the plan. Tony pressed something on the mask, tapped it. "Is this thing still on?" The eyes lit up and scanned Tony's figure. "Start recording." The light in the eyes blinked, telling him that it already started.

"Okay. Uh. Hi, Cap. If you're seeing this, then I'll probably be dead 'cause there is no way I would let you find this recording as long as I'm alive." Tony sighed before continuing, "I don't even know if you're alive, or dead, or disintegrated. I'm not sure I want to know unless it's the former. But I'm sorry. I wish I had called you earlier. Maybe things would be okay. Maybe we would've won. Or lose, but either way, it'll be better if we were together. Sorry I lashed out on Barnes. I know how much he means to you, I hope he's okay. It's been such a long time, Cap. I miss going on 1 AM ferryboat rides with you. I didn't really know what I was doing with the Avengers when you weren't here. There.

"Look, if you're seeing this, don't feel bad, okay? I'm not saying that it wasn't wrong what you did, but what happened to us after that is just as much as my fault as it is yours. I ran out of food and water four days ago, the oxygen supply will only last till tomorrow morning, I don't know what to do. I'll probably suffocate, like that time when I lost you. Have I lost you, Cap? You know, you said that you'll be here if I need you, well, I need you very much right now. Save me, Steve. Like you always did. I need to-- I'm sorry I couldn't say this in person. But, when I'm drifting off, I will dream about you. God, Steve.. It was always you."

Nebula placed her hand on Tony's shoulder after he turned off the mask. Tony turned his head to look at her and she brushed her mechanic thumb over his cheek. He hadn't realized he was crying. Tony had told Nebula about Steve, about Siberia, things he couldn't tell Rhodey or Peter or Pepper because he knew they would see Steve differently. After the fight, Tony laid on the cold ground of Siberia for hours until Happy found him. He had sent an alert to Happy, he made Happy promised to not tell anyone else. They went to see Dr. Helen Cho, he too made her promised.

Tony fell asleep, he wished he wouldn't have to wake up and just die peacefully, but an hour to his sleep, he heard voices. Familiar voices. He woke up to see wires attached to the mask. "Nebula, unattach yourself from the mask. It's hurting you. You said so," he told her, his voice laced with concern. When they jumpstarted the jet with Nebula's help, she was screaming in agony, she told him that it hurts her everytime she uses a part of herself, it drains her out. "You're dying, Stark. Talk to them."

His best friend, Rhodey, appeared as a hologram. It was like a broken VHS, maybe it's the connection, Tony was already so grateful. "Rhodes?" His voice is broken and raspy, it hurts him when he speaks, thanks to the lack of water. "Tones! I-- Goi--" The audio was cut off, Tony barely understood what Rhodey was saying. "List-- We're gon-- Carol i-- We are on ou--" "What?" "On our wa-- Our way." He smiled, he didn't know which Carol that Rhodey talked about. It couldn't be Carol Danvers, could it?

The hologram suddenly went out, before there was another incoming call. Tony answered it, his eyes kept flickering back-and-forth toward Nebula, he didn't like knowing that his only friend in outer space is in pain for his sake. He realized the background was different, it was the quinjet. He missed it. He wasn't sure if he would ever get into another jet if he survived this. A figure came to his sight. His eyes looked restless, his beard seemed like it was freshly shaved, his voice was almost as raspy as Tony's.

"Steve?" The man on the other side smiled at Tony's voice. Tears left both their eyes, they didn't care, they missed each other. Tony's hand reached out to touch the hologram, it went through Steve but Tony held his hand by Steve's cheek. He knew Steve wouldn't feel it but it's still better than nothing. "The oxygen.. It's running out soon."

"You hang on, alright, acushla?" Steve said. Acushla. It's Irish, it's Steve's petname for Tony. He only says it when it was just the two of them. By the corner of his eyes, Tony could see Nebula wincing in pain, he figured she had give her all so the connection would be more stable. "I'm sorry, Steve. For everything. It's my fa--" He didn't know whether Steve could make out what he said, though, before he could finish it, Steve cut him off, "it's just as much as my fault as it is yours. Maybe more of mine."

"You got my message?" "Yeah, right before we called." Steve's smile was weak, this time it was Steve who reached out to touch Tony, they both swore they could feel each other's presence. Their forehead touched - not really, but it was enough. "If I could change what happened at Si--" Steve cut him off again. "Stop talking, you'll run out of oxygen quicker if you keep talking. You hang on, okay? We're going as quick as we can."

Nebula grunted. Tony looked at her before looking back at the hologram, "I have to go. You go save the world, okay? I love you. I wish we worked it out sooner." He tried his best to smile. "You're gonna be fine! Tony, list--" He unattached the mask from Nebula and hugged her. He whispered strings of 'sorry' and 'thank you' to her.

He laid down infront of the window, he turned his head to look at the stars. He thought of what would happen if he hadn't got kidnapped almost eleven years ago. He wondered if the boy in Sokovia would still be alive. He wondered if he had met Harley and Peter. He wondered if things would still be the same, yet so much better.

His thoughts drift off to Steve. He looked at the stars. Steve would love this. Steve was weak for stars and spaces. He remembered their first date, their first rendezvous. Tony took Steve to NASA, he kissed Steve in the Zero Gravity room. They were floating, it was cliché, but magical. He could've done it with his armor and carry Steve, but Steve wanted logical. He wanted to be normal, they both did. When they had gone to Clint's farmhouse, Steve cried later that night in their shared room. He could've had it, maybe with Peggy, but he had to sacrifice himself. Steve regret being Captain America sometimes. He wished he was a little selfish. Tony promised him a normal life, right before Steve left for his mission at Lagos. 

The first time they had made love was in Italy, it was Maria's house. It was spring in 2014. After Siberia, Tony wondered if Steve already knew about Barnes and his parents murder or not when they made love. But Tony is dying, he's not going to think about whether or not Steve lied to him when they made love. Tony closed his eyes and pictured Steve beside him, gazing at him the way Steve always do, Steve's index finger ran along Tony's facial features. Steve always did that, Tony didn't know why, maybe it helps Steve sketch the details even better. Tony remembered waking up to Steve sketching beside him more than once. "Are you drawing me when I'm asleep, creep?" He would joke. Steve would laugh and put down his sketch book and kissed Tony. They'd make love.

Tony wondered if anyone knows about this. About them. Maybe Natasha. Rhodey knew. Of course he knew, Tony's eyes lit up whenever they talk about Steve during lunch. Tony started to think about Rhodey. He had always been a great friend to Tony. They met in MIT, Tony used to third-wheel Rhodey and Carol. He wished he could hold on a little longer to see if it really was Carol Danvers that Rhodey mentioned. Tony was so happy when Rhodey got into the marines. He missed Rhodey. He hoped it really was Carol Danvers, maybe she could ease his pain when Tony dies. Carol and Rhodey was always happy. They had the healthiest relationship. And they didn't mind Tony tagging along on their dates. Tony would take pictures of them.

Tony could feel himself suffocating. He opened his eyes again to look at the stars. His life flashed before his eyes. Then he heard Steve's soft voice. "I love you, Acushla. I will see you on the other side." Tony smiled as he breathe out his last breath.

Three days later, Steve arrived with Rhodey, Carol, and Thor. Nebula stayed there with Tony eversince he died. As soon as Rhodey saw his friend's lifeless body, he broke down. He cried and wailed. He begged for him to come back. He said he was sorry it took so long. Carol had to hold Rhodey. Steve just stood a few feet away, his stare is empty, he felt cold, like he had lost a part of himself. He just stood. Thor was about to pick Tony's body up but Nebula spoke, "he wanted to stay. He told me when his time has come.. He wanted to stay." Rhodey begged for Thor to take him back to earth with them, but Thor respected Tony's wish. "But he'll be all alone!" Rhodey was the one who had it collected, he was wise, and strong, and to see him like this.

"I'll stay," Steve said. He earned confused looks from the others. Carol broke the silence, "Rogers, despite the fact that you're a supersoldier, maybe you'll survive without oxygen but you need food and water. And we can give you some, but it won't be enough. You'll die." "That's the plan." He walked toward Tony's body and sat down. He laid the corpse's head on his lap. "Captain, don't do this. The world needs you. Come home with us," Thor plead.

"What is home, Thor? He was my home. He needed me and I couldn't be there. I promised I would." Steve sounded so broken, he felt like he was the boy he was before the serum. "What about Barnes?" Rhodey asked. "He has Natasha. Sam has you. I wouldn't have anyone. Please, understand. Let me be selfish for once. I don't see a reason to save the world anymore, Rhodey. I lost mine a few years ago with a chance of having him back in my arms, but this is it. I can't bring him back. I couldn't save him. Let me stay with him, please." Tears left his eyes as he ran his thumb over Tony's blue lips. Tony must've been so cold and scared.

A few moments later, he felt Rhodey's hand on his shoulder before getting embraced. "Thank you. For staying with him." Steve knew that Tony didn't tell Rhodey about Siberia. Rhodey would hurt Steve if he found out, Steve would let him. He deserved it. Carol kissed Tony's forehead and nodded at Steve. Carol was the second closest friend to Tony. Nebula held Tony's hand. Thor did the same but he gave Steve a hug. Rhodey took one last look at them, at Tony, and left them. It took them awhile to start the jet, they were hesitating, they didn't want to leave Steve and Tony. But they're together now.

Steve hummed the words to 'Too Ra Loo Ra Loo Ral' - an Irish lullaby his mother used to sing to him. It took him about two months - two months of silence, tears, regrets, and guilt - when he's finally uniting with Tony in a deep, peaceful sleep.


End file.
